I've been looking for work since, oh ... forever. OK, really only 19 months! A ghastly process of hard labor animated by mandatory optimism in the face of serial crushing rejection.
On the plus side, I've learned a lot. And by this I refer not to my fresh acquaintance with poverty and the constant scramble to keep groceries in the larder, fire in the furnace and light in the lamps; nor to the thrill of living without health insurance at my age, with all my prescriptions. I don't even mean the full, rich flavor of shame that I am brining home no bacon for my bride and leeching money from every pocket I can slip my sweaty palms into. No. In fact it is myself I've learned so much about through this. Even though I've been right here in front of me, so to speak, all along, there was just a whole lot about me I'd never really noticed.
See, I have been writing letters to perfect strangers—often whole committees of strangers, in fact—explaining to them why they should hire me. This has necessitated a great deal of reflection upon what I have done over the course of my life, what skills I have acquired, what I have accomplished, and how. This reflective process has carried with it the corollary inventories: what I have not learned, what I have failed to accomplished, and why not.
Yes, all this has been enormously instructive; indeed, so instructive that I wish I had gone through this ordeal years ago.
As with anyone in this situation, no doubt, my ruminations have hardly been confined to the professional aspects of my life. Working on a sales pitch for myself involved also examinations of my strengths and my weaknesses. Almost surprising me, I find that I am not ashamed. By the same token, I am convinced that I have avoided arrogance on very solid grounds.
About which more later.
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